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More than a fathead
9 years ago after Cam Newtons national championship run I was gifted this very fathead. 9 years later he still sticks strong. First hung in my room he watched over me, I pray to him before every Auburn game asking him to give the team his strength, and guidance. He was then transferred to my basement to flourish. Sadly, we had bad floods. My brothers AJ Green fathead stuck next to Cam. Jj ended up in a ball soaked in the corner of the room. Cam stuck strong to the wall, only losing a leg. He stayed this way, humbly over time. Recently, we renovated my basement, and we had to transfer him again. I was worried, what is the life expectancy of a fathead? Will he stick again? I quite believe that praying to this fathead, won us Iron Bowls, and gave me strength in defeat. The past couple days have not been good fr our friend. When Cam Newton announced he was celibate, his groin region fell of the wall, this cannot be a coincidence. Then the other night, I was awakened by a tear (The fathead is right next to my bed). The brevity of the situation only dawned on me the next day. His head had fallen off the wall. This was no ordinary night though. This was the night Auburn tragically lost in the final four, and was robbed of a magical season. Again, not a coincidence. I truly believe Fathead has harnessed some sort of divine power, and sold me something by mistake. I am not worthy of this, no one is. I strongly recommend this product as it has represented my fandom over the last 9…